September 22, 2015
Why people have so much trouble remembering stuff, like appointments
If you're typical of most people, you forget appointments. In spite of calendars on the wall, and on your phone, and reminders on the refrigerator, you forget stuff. It's the majority of people, so if you forget stuff, it's like being in a gigantic group - it gets lots of sympathy. Everybody forgets stuff.
If you're offended by people who forget stuff, like appointments with you, then you understand why people forget stuff: because it's not important to them. And the message is clear - you have been forgotten because other things were more important to the other person. Kind'a hurts your feelings, doesn't it? Maybe it makes you mad? You are getting a clear message that the other person isn't thinking about you.
So, if you want to know what's important to you, just think of what you remember. And it doesn't take a lot of brain power. How much brain power did you have when you remembered that Christmas was coming when you were a little kid? I love to give that example, because we remember what's important.
Nobody is going to come right out and say to someone that they aren't important. But when I'm left standing somewhere because it has "slipped someone's mind" that they were supposed to meet me at a certain time, well, I know I'm not Christmas.
The one and only time that I completely blew off a job interview, back in the '90s, was for a job that I really didn't want. And when it suddenly occurred to me, two days later, that I had forgotten the appointment, it was fine. I didn't want the job, and the place didn't want to hire someone who didn't want the job. Really, no hard feelings.
So if you're constantly forgetting stuff, don't blame it on a "senior moment" or "being distracted". It's just a clear message to you that you're making appointments for things you don't want to do. And then ask yourself, "why am I doing this stuff?" Once you answer that question, you will start making appointments for things that you actually want to do, and you will be looking forward to them.
Yeah, most people won't understand, but then you're not most people!
Posted by Brad Hall